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Wednesday, 15 December 2010

Some People Are Never Satisfied!

We have been spending "quality time" with the BST (Behavioural Specialist Team) just lately....a getting to know you kind of thing.

This is good, it relaxes Daisy and lulls me into a false sense of security. For the BST has a plan up their collective sleeve.


It is becoming increasingly clear to me that the BST want Daisy to return to full-time mainstream education. I understand why they want this, as they are thinking of Daisy and her socialising with other children of her own age, but they don't seem to appreciate that Daisy's peer group are a real problem for us.

I have been trying to put into words exactly what PDA is, and I rediscovered this:

It's a lot to read, I'll admit....but this is Daisy and it's very hard to find all the right information in the same place at the same time.

I also found this:

Now...if you have got this far down the page, I am wondering if the same thoughts went through your head as they did through mine.....

....."where the Hell is the school that is prepared to do this for ONE CHILD?"

Daisy is impossible to teach in blocks of 30 minutes, sitting at a table with a group of other children, all focusing on teacher or whiteboard...she cannot physically do this. She fidgets, she wriggles, she is highly disruptive to any other child who is NT (Neuro-logically Typical, i.e. non-autistic) and she has to focus on something else in order to absorb the information that you actually want her to take in. Teaching Daisy is very much like talking to yourself. She has relatively good eye contact (except when she's PDA-ing) if you ask her to look because she needs to see to understand, but otherwise? Only if she wants to. If you try and *make* her then you've *lost* her. She'll just PDA because she can't not. Daisy is not like any other SEN (Special Educational Needs) child. We have come into contact with a few professionals who have taught autistic children, and PDA is yet another colour on the Autistic Spectrum, yet the teaching methods for Autistic and AS children are a pole apart from the methods required for a PDA child. They are also, I think, quite disruptive for the rest of the class. The only way to get Daisy engaged is to go almost completely over the top. Be loud, be funny, be the most interesting thing in the room and above prepared to get it totally wrong sometimes!  There are days when it is impossible to teach Daisy anything yet there are others when she needs to know everything NOW! Her inconsistency is her most consistent feature!

Apart from her time in Year One, when she absolutely blossomed under the tutelage of Miss C and Mrs R, her time at school was a complete and utter disaster. She was a wreck and I wasn't much better. I am not prepared to go back to that, for either of our sakes.

So the BST team, can help me with the biting, scratching, kicking and verbal abuse...but mainstream school is not an option. Sorry.


  1. I think, as a parent, you are the one that gets to make that decision. As Daisy grows a bit, who knows what possibilities may happen. But for now? I would trust yourself and what your heart knows is best for Daisy.

  2. Stand by your guns. I have a big thing about children needing extra help being forced to go through mainstream school, it doesnt benefit anyone and only further isolates the child in question. My own son copes well in mainstream school as he is only mild aspergers and I am happy with him being there, but I think it is wrong for the so-called experts to force these things. I often wonder how they would feel if they had to live your life for 2 weeks following their rules, they might think differently then. Follow your instincts, and good luck x